Friday, 30 December 2011
A friend of mine and I just spent about half an hour writing a list of our top men of all time.. So as this year is coming to an end, I am going to share my Top 50 Hottest men list with you!
Now, this is my list so some of you may disagree, if so I would love you to share your list with me..
Ok, here it goes..
1) Channing Tatum
2) Josh Duhamel
3) Eric Dane
4) Enrique Iglesias
5) Dermot Mulroney
6) Michael Buble
7) Harry Styles
8) Zac Efron
9) Liam Hemsworth
10) Tom Hardy
11) Jamie Redknapp
12) Josh Hartnett
13) David Beckham
14) Taylor Lautner
15) Colin Farrell
16) Mark Wright
17) Russell Brand
18) Ryan Gossling
19) Ashton Kutcher
20) Gerard Butler
21) Jared Leto
22) Chase Crawford
23) Ed Westwick
24) Bradley Cooper
25) Kellan Lutz
26) Gino Dcampo
27) Hayden Christensen
28) Milo Ventimiglia
29) George Clooney
30) Xavier Samuel
31) Rick Malambri
32) Jake Gyllenhall
33) Robert Pattinson (i bet a lot of you are screaming cos you think he is amazing but lets be honest, he is not that hot. Only hot in twilight as a blood sucking vampire and I would let him suck me but way after half these people!!)
34) Dougie Poynter
35) Orlando Bloom
36) Andrew Garfield
37) Michael Cera
38) Hugh Grant
39) Peter Facinelli
40) Brad Pitt
41) Johnny Depp
42) Matthew Mcconnaughey
43) Paul Wesley
44) Penn Badgley
45) Justin Timberlake
46) Matthew Morrison
47) Gary Barlow
48) Jeffrey Dean Morgan
49) Sean William Scott
50) Ryan Seacrest
I couldn't do a list with adding my top 5 women I would turn lesbian for..
1) Sofia Vergara
2) Adriana Lima
3) Mila Kunis
4) Nicole Scherzinger
I hope you all liked the list.. Comment below your own list or if you agree with mine. You can also email the list to firstname.lastname@example.org or tweet me @LittleMissVak or my fb page http://www.facebook.com/LMissV
Thank you all so much for continuing throughout the year to read my blog. It means a lot to me that people actually read it and enjoy it..
HAPPY NEW YEAR DOLLS!!
Little Miss V..xx
Posted by Little Miss V at 21:37
Friday, 23 December 2011
I asked a gorgeous friend of mine and fellow blogger, Carly, if she would like to do a guest blog for me and she accepted! She is fab, as is her writing. She is funny, witty, dirty and talented, just like me ;)
I hope you all enjoy her post.
To see more of her writing check out her blog.. http://heelzandhangovers.blogspot.com
It’s the most wonderful time of the year isn’t it? Putting the star on top of the tree, eating mince pies and hoping that Santa sees past enough of all the naughty things you’ve done this year to put you on his prezzie list. There are kisses under the mistletoe and on top of the kitchen table, lazy public holiday lay ins and of course catch up Martini nights where us girls get together to misbehave and swap bedroom secrets…
Alexi: “19 cm”
Carly: “Shut the fuck up.”
Alexi: “ I measured it!”
Lea: “Where from his belly button?”
Carly: “ Can you feel it poking your pancreas?”
Alexi: “What?! No!”
Lea: “Then you measured wrong!”
Carly: “ What about Rob?”
Lea: “You mean the Girthenator, check this out.”
Lea shows me a picture of Rob, her new boyfriend, in his favourite pair of blue underwear.
Carly: “Jesus, he really is the Girthenator”
Alexi: “What about…”
Carly: “My guy has the most perfect penis in the world. It fits me like a tailored Chanel suit, in fact if I could have a mold made into a dildo for when I’m away. That would suit me just fine…”
Lea: “Ahhh, over share!”
Alexi: “Yeah, TMI.”
Lea: “I once dated a guy with balls the size of apples!”
Carly: “No, I’m all about the penis. I like a good plum or litchi sized ball… and like is a strong word.”
Alexi: “Another round?”
Carly and Lea: “Yes please!”
As our glasses chink together and we down what’s left of our cosmopolitans I cant help but giggle to myself and wonder, does the bulge make the man?
When I was 15 my best friend and I found ourselves making out with two skateboarding super hotties we’d chatted up. I knew it was time to take the plunge… my hand fumbled past the awkward button/zipper roadblock and hesitantly gripped. My 1st penile experience… hard, slightly curved to the right and about the size of a large gherkin. Really? This is it? Gross. As I got older and with many more tree house esque experiences I came to understand this new found territory a little better. Of course back then I had no basis for comparison… now, slightly more.
For years I have had the pleasure of feeling exactly like a kid on Christmas morning, about to unwrap packages with no idea of what may lie under the tinsel and ribbon. I’ve had some good surprises, some not so good and some very unexpected treats. These do not always coincide with the overall result, as I’m sure all of us will agree that a big package does not necessarily a good Christmas make. In fact if I think back to my top 3 Man Muscles I cant remember any one of them making me Joyful and Triumphant.
The first belonged to a guy who wouldn’t stop talking dirty to me. I’m all for spicing it up but not on date 1(If you can even call it that) and most certainly not dead sober. I don’t know how I ended up sharing a bed with Russell and his ginormous love muscle, when you are 19 you tend to skip the preproduction for these things and I guess they just happen. All I could think was thank God the lights are off so he cant see the look on my face as he explains how he would like to “cum inside me and fuck me raw”. It was probably a similar face to one you would pull after taking a sip of milk 5 days after the sell by date. One eye closed, nose crinkled up slightly grimaced and 11 out of 10 on the uncomfortable scale. There’s no way this guy is getting inside me. I dodged the window of possible penetration thinking I could end it all with a quick BJ if only my mouth could accommodate his meat thermometer. Both of us went to sleep completely unsatisfied and a little embarrassed.
Then there was the owner of what I can only describe as the Giant Meatloaf who revealed himself to me as we began to make out in the street by my car. I can remember thinking, what is it with guys and their big dicks, do they think just because they are well endowed that they can whip it out at anytime and our panties will automatically drop and turn into a symbolic welcome matt saying “Please Enter Me Immediately”? What happened to romance, to chivalry, to base 2, 3 and 4? Insulted by his sense of entitlement I kissed him on the cheek and left him standing pants round him ankles in 4th avenue alone.
Even when you do everything right, not all Purple-Headed Soldiers make it into battle. I had a whirlwind romance with Gerd. Unlike the other 2 Bolony Pony owners, there were some feelings involved. We sparked. We had chemistry. We were out of town and away from all responsibility with a group of friends on a farm. Away from my boyfriend too. Nothing like a bit of nature and fresh air to make you sing: “Oh Come all Yeah UnFaithful!”. It was wrong in every way making our secret love affair even hotter. We were sharing a room with people and so had to keep everything super quiet… whispering to each other in the dark under the sheets after I’d quietly snuck into the bed with him. I felt him press up against me and suddenly realized what I was up against. A Monster. We tried for hours to get in sync but put plain and simply… he was just too big. I bit down on the pillow after attempt 12 and realized that my tight little tigress was never going to be able to play host to such a force of nature. It was as if I’d unwrapped a box with a beautiful pair of shoes inside… 2 sizes too small. Returns not accepted.
And then I think back to some of the best sex I’ve ever had… most of which happened with owners of probably very average Impalers. I can’t remember… It was so good, I guess I wasn’t focused on how big they were just on how good they felt and how well they were operated. In my opinion a man who knows how to take command of the Anaconda can very well trump a guy with a Savage Salami in bed. I’m not completely un-superficial… I’ve had my fair share of these moments:
Carly: “Ok, I’m ready… I want you inside me!”
Under average Joe: “Um… I am. I have been for the last 15 minutes. I thought you came already?”
Carly: “Oh. Um… yeah, I was just role playing you know… lets carry on.”
Cue Sour Milk face followed by a major Fake.
A situation probably easily forgiven had I been eaten out as if I were a festive dessert and sent into xmas ecstasy instead of being pummeled inconsiderately like a jack hammer with a tool that seemed to be Christmas cracker gift size. Just saying.
So… what do women want in their stockings this year? I’ll tell you.
We want time… everywhere. We want generous foreplay. We want long expeditions to the South Pole. We want excitement. We want to feel powerless and powerful all at the same time. We want to feel beautiful and be looked at like the goddesses we are. We want bragging rights so that at the next Martini party we can tell everyone how our boyfriend makes the Karma Sutra look like a children’s bedtime story. We want candles, mood music and rose petals sometimes and sometimes we want our hair pulled and our panties ripped off. Most importantly we want a man who knows who he is and knows who we are enough to confidently play on that thin line between almost bliss and endless rapture. A man who knows his Candy Cane is but one Christmas charm amongst a tree of trinkets and tricks. After all it’s not the gift, but the thought that counts.
Posted by Little Miss V at 20:04
Thursday, 15 December 2011
I have always been the kind of girl who has never enjoyed dating guys my own age.
When I was 16 I went out with a guy who was 23. When I was 19 I was dating a 17 year old (and taking his virginity). Now at the age of 23 I wonder if I am supposed to be looking for the older guy to settle with, or the younger guy to have fun with.
I have always found that guys my own age are very immature. Well, they do say the male brain is three years behind the female. So that means a guy my age really acts like a 20 year old. So if I start dating a 20 year old, really he has the brain of a 17 year old? What I have noticed is that younger guys will always try harder to be at your maturity level, mainly to impress you.
“A man who hasn’t had many or any long-term relationships is far more likely to be open to friendly instruction,” says Dr Pam Spurr. "He’s still exploring and learning, so you’ve got a better opportunity to mould him.” “A younger man may not have fallen in love before, so you might be his first." “That can make it feel incredibly exciting for both of you.” That said, it might also make him overly intense. “Not having dealt with these deep feelings before might make him come on too strong, in terms of commitment or even jealous behaviour,” says Dr Pam.
More women than ever before are looking outside of their own age group to find love, and according to the Office for National Statistics, it’s mostly cougars on the prowl. More women are marrying younger men than ever before. Celebs are doing it too: Halle Berry, Madonna and Demi Moore have all tried younger men, while women like Catherine Zeta Jones and Katie Holmes got hitched to older guys. Dating out of your age bracket can work to your advantage but will also have the disadvantages. Look at Caroline Flack. She is 32 years old and has just started dating Harry Styles from One Direction who is only 17 years old. Like I said earlier, I am a girl who will date younger guys but come on.. that is just wrong. She had nearly finished high school when he was born. From what I have seen, she has been getting lots of hate mail and I am not suprised. (most probably frome me cos he is MY man and she needs to plank on a knife!!) Demi Moore, 49, married Ashton Kutcher 32 a few years back. Now they are on the brink of a divorce due to cheating rumours on Ashton's behalf.
So, can dating a younger guy lead to disaster? Will they get bored and cheat? Or do some of these 'cougars' do it due to boredm? Do they think dating a younger guy will keep them on their toes? Lets be honest, women age very gracefully so it is easy to bag a younger guy but you need to be sure of what you want before you get too involved. If casual is more you thing then go for it, but if you are looking for something more long term, make sure he is aware of that.
I guess some women will go for the 'toyboy' if they just cannot deal with the 'baggage' that may come with an older man EG divorce, an ex wife, divorce etc.
Once a man hits around 35, he’s usually got a good idea of what he’s good at and what he’s not. So he is less likely to be changeable in terms of his career, the way he behaves, but it also makes him less fickle when it comes to love. He has been there, done it and probably got more notches on his bed post than you. Well, some of you! You will probably have more security when it comes to the older guy.
“The advantage of a man who’s been around the block is that he’s learned from his exes,” says Dr Pam. “Every relationship, every break-up has a lesson in it.” And there’s the physical knowledge too. “Men who have been in long-term relationships learn a lot about women’s bodies,” Ok so thats good. Date an older guy and maybe he will actually be able to find my G-spot and not think its a watch when I ask him to look for it - (this is what happened with the 17 year old back in the day!!)
After thinking about all of this I decided to make a top 5 list of my hottest younger guys and older men.
Top 5 Older men I would get it on with:
1) Eric Dane - aka McSteamy from Greys Anatomy
2) Dermot Mulroney - best know for his roles in The Wedding Date and My Best Friends Wedding
3) Antonio Banderas - The sexy Spaniard
4) Patrick Swayze - Obviously in his Dirty Dancing days..
5) Gerard Butler - From the moment he played Gerry in PS I Love You, I fell in love
Top 5 Younger guys I would get it on with:
1) Harry Styles - One Direction
2) Taylor Lautner - aka Jacob in Twilight.. oooh topless in each film. Yum.
3) Zack Efron - Need I say more?
4) Frankie Cocozza - He may be a shameful coke whore but that rocker vibe does it for me and then he can add my name to his ass
5) Jeremy Sumpter - He believed in fairies in Peter Pan and he can believe in me being his fairy godmother :)
Would love to hear from you guys if you have had a relationship with the Toyboy or the older guy and how it went for you?
Little Miss V..xx
Posted by Little Miss V at 00:48
Friday, 2 December 2011
Ok, so no i'm not really in love with a stripper. But i'm not going to lie, I do kind of love the thought of it all.
You see, last night, myself and some friends went to a strip club. I have always wanted to go to one to know what actually goes on behind closed doors and see what they are really like and not just how I see them on films.
This was my first time in a strip club in London and I was actually quite excited. You see, the only other time I have been to a strip club was in Amsterdam a year ago. The place was vile. Not only was it cold and gloomy but the girls were already naked and happy to put their vagina in your face. LITERALLY. We had bought a dance for one of the boys and the girl giving him the dance actually put his nose into her asshole. Hole. Yes. ASSHOLE! That to me was really gross and degrading for them, then again, it was Amsterdam and I should have expected that we were going to be knee deep in clunge. Wellie boots please!!
So in we walked. The interior was very nice. Quite welcoming to be honest. Was not gloomy and dirty but in fact quite smart and classy. The first thing to catch my eye were swings at the bar. How fun is that!! The second thing I noticed was the fact half of the girls in this place were UGLY! When you see a strip club in a film, all the girls are beautiful with nice breasts and mysterious eyes. Not here. Most of the ladies were Eastern European and not that good looking with bad hair extensions and an even worse attitude.
So down Max, Anna and I sit and straight away girls are looking at us. At first I am not sure if it is Max's muscly arms that caught their attention, or the fact that he was there with Anna and I. Bit odd for a guy to go to a strip club with two girls I guess. Then again, Anna and I are not your average kind of girls. So first round of drinks come anf our first stripper comes and sits down with us. After a while she can tell we are not interested and walks off to a group of Asian guys. So the three of us are sitting there having a laugh, catching up and watching girls dance on a pole. One of the girls dancing caught my eye for having massive tattoos down the right side of her body, but also for knowing how to dance on that pole. Let me tell you, girl could dance.
I looked around the club to see the kind of people inside. On one table there was a group of white guys in suits. Business meeting maybe? Not sure but they were soon enough joined by some girls. On another table is a group of Asian guys. Also in suits. After work fun clearly! Then I see an old guy sitting on his own. Girls keep going to say hi and kissing him hello. Obviously he is a regular and knows them all well. Part of me wondered why a guy clearly in his mid 60's was spending his nights in a strip club? Boredm? Lonliness?
So after some food and more drinks, down sits *FiFi. At first I had actually said that she was odd looking and Russian where in fact she was pretty decent and English. Our conversation included our love of games such as Tetris and Solitaire and how her boyfriend does not know she does this job. Fifi was telling me how she has danced her whole life including Burlesque dance. Before working in a strip club too, she had an office job but after spending most of her day playing solitaire, she knew it was not for her. She was really lovely and nice to talk to. After some chit chat, FiFi went to dance on stage.
Some other girls then came to sit with us and talk to us. It is funny to talk to them when they are so normal. The first perception you get is that they must be dirty slores and miserable and not nice to talk to, when in fact they are normal girls just trying to make some money. And do they make money!! i had to ask, I was very intreigued. So there I am sat in a strip club talking to FiFi, Sunshine and Cat about the kind of money they make. They pay the club to basically rent space lets call it. That is about 80 pounds a night. Once they have covered that, everything else is theirs. They can make anything from 100 - 1000 pounds a night. Each dance they give is done in a private area away form your table at 20 pounds a dance. You are not allowed to touch the girls. Security is very tight and people are always looking to make sure things are all good. People will also buy the girls drinks so it is often that they are getting drunk.
Getting drunk on the job and making maybe 500 pounds a night. Why am I not doing this? Haha!
About half an hour after talking to the girls, our friend Adam came to join us. More drinks were being bought. So it was the four of us and 5 of the strippers sat at our table. The ones that were not sat at our table were obviously very jelous as we were drinking, laughing and having a great time. The four of us then went to sit in a private area with four of the girls and we were all given a dance. Now I am the kind of girl who is up for anything. Ok, not anything, but most things. Seeing girls naked is not something new for me. I am naked with my girls all the time. To be honest, I actually did not know where to look. Four girls, four vajayjays and eight boobs. Max had a dance with FiFi, I had Sunshine, Anna had Cat and Adam had Melody. Melody was actually really pretty with great breasts and I kept looking over at her. My girls hair extensions were as rough as elephants hair which was a bit off putting to be honest. So once again my eyes were wondering. Catching the look on Anna's face and then to Adam and to Max. The grins on their faces were priceless. Adam was touching Anna's leg as obviously you cannot touch the girls and he was getting worked up.
In one sense, I think for guys its all just a bit of a prick tease. They get a dance, get a boner and cannot do anything about it. Is there point wasting your money on that? Why not I say. All for some fun and something different.
As girls, I can fairly say that Anna and I enjoyed ourselves. New experience and all. I would deffinately go back. Not because I am into the girls but at the end of the day it is actually nice to hang out and drink there and also nice to talk to the girls. If anyone wants to come, let me know, come along and join :)
Little Miss V..xx
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Posted by Little Miss V at 14:17